Thursday, July 22, 2010

Sparks

I've been trying to "figure out" what life is like for David. Now, in the Bible, God calls it Paradise and we humans have limited views of Paradise. In fact, I think most of us have different views of what Paradise would be. From my experience with him, Paradise for David is a place where, first of all, he is in God's presence and secondly, he can experience total joy. Joy for David would be cutting grass, or some kind of hard work, followed by a golf game, a good meal and then rest.

I understood David so well - and he understood me well. We could finish each others' sentences, order meals for each other, we knew when to laugh at each other and when not to laugh - and you see - therein lies my dilemma.
In reality, I have no idea what he is really experiencing - for over 15 years, I knew his thoughts, his habits, his likes and dislikes - and I don't believe he has any dislikes now - I'm positive all is good in Paradise -
But - I do miss knowing what he is experiencing, thinking, enjoying. I miss him.

I met a new friend for dinner this week - he talked about his wife and I talked about David. Some friends asked if there were "sparks" between us - I'm not sure how anyone can feel sparks for a new friend when they are in love with their spouse -
I am in love with David and this friend is in love with his wife - even though they are in heaven and we can't enjoy that love the way we would like.

I remember watching TV one evening and David asked - "Who do you think is a good looking actor?", to which I replied - "I don't." "What do you mean?" he asked. "I don't think of other males as good looking - I only think of you."

Sparks - they fly from my heart when I think of David - and they always will.

Enjoy those who make sparks fly in your world :)
Mary